Happy 2 birthday to this blog! I was excited about this milestone, but, had one of the hardest days in a while. No, not every day is perfect and picturesque, which was why I set out to be a positive and REAL influence to as many people as I could. At that moment, I wanted to smile and share my excitement, but that would have been a facade. Yes, I was incredibly ecstatic, but smiling and jumping up and down like it's the only thing on my mind would have been a lie. Over these 2 years, I have learned a ton about myself and refocused my vision. In this post, I want to share a little about my experience, what I have learned, and how to radically accept what life throws at you.
When this platform was created, I was full of energy and ambition to make a difference. There were setbacks as expected, but it was invigorating. I was surrounded by people that wanted nothing but to see me succeed. Not even a few months after we launched, I began questioning a lot of things in my everyday life. I was at the heart of my nursing program at Purdue.
I am passionate about fitness, and the more I poured into my platform, filling my cup with fitness and wellness, I found a lot of areas that did not excite me. I began questioning nursing as a career path. I was seeing a lot of chronic/on chronic conditions in clinical that took so much out of me to participate in, and I was just a student. There are a lot of people out there that do not take care of their bodies. They will have elective spine surgery because there back hurts, instead of strengthening their body or trying other options first. This challenge is still present now as a healthcare provider, I have been on the other side of the knife as well and have learned a lot about the process.
I knew activity as medicine excited me, so I chased physical therapy. I ran myself ragged for a summer doing all the pre-requisites most people do in 3-4 years in 1 summer while getting my classes paid for by working in a research lab. I was working my hardest and was energized even when I was stressed by the grandiosity of my goals. I was applying for graduate programs while finishing my senior nursing courses. I interviewed with Mayo Clinic's DPT program and was accepted into another prestigious school. When looking at the debt it would take to put myself through this school, I knew I had to be sure it was what I wanted to do 110%. For some reason, I felt my calling was in Rochester, Minnesota, even though I had no idea why, or in what scope. I started as a nurse in a brand new city, open to whatever opportunity and passions that I found during the journey.
I say all of this because our dreams shift. Our ambitions stifle. Life changes unexpectedly in the blink of an eye. What we worked so hard for and thought we wanted, when placed in front of us, may no longer fit for you. And guess what… THAT'S ok!
In the beginning, I wanted to make sure I always had perfectly curated content and aesthetic photos with a smile on my face (while still being my sassy self). My experiences have left me valuing very different things than I previously had. I do like to put my best foot forward and love creating relevant content but was pressured earlier on to have the esthetic to try and impact more people. I am a perfectionist by nature, so I like having symmetrical graphics and such, but I want to also be pure to who I am. As I have grown as a person, I find myself putting my phone down to engage more wholeheartedly in each and every moment... And there is not a perfect picture for that if you're doing it right.
Could I have more intentional with my content over the 2 years?
Of course
I often have to remind myself that this is my outlet to share my passion, and sometimes I need a break from the pressures of what everything looks like and live in reality. Reality is, sometimes, I enjoy laying on the couch in my athleisure wear, and sometimes I lay on the mat at the gym, frustrated with my lack of motivation.
Now to what I learned through it all about myself and my passions. The first big take away that has helped me so much is to just radically accept what life throws your way. Instead of viewing the world in a way that it feels like bad things are continually happening to you, take whatever you are going throw. In a challenging moment, I often tell myself:
5 things I have learned in the past 2 years!
Whatever your outlet is, it is yours. How often I publish content doesn't reflect why I set out to do this. I wanted this to be my outlet as naturally as it happened, and I have done my best to stay true to that.
Time is fickle. Cherish what you have and surround yourself with like-minded people.
Not everyone is in your life for a good reason. This is all I will say about that.
Growing up is like losing your mom in the grocery store for life.
Never be afraid to try. I always say "what if's" are where dreams go to die.
This process has been anything but easy, so I want to share another helpful strategy I have used to manage my anxiety as best I can.
Radical acceptance cheat sheet:
Life gives you scenario A
You know you cannot go back in time and try to make something else happen, so you have to deal with whatever it is at this moment.
Tell yourself, "ok, this is what is going on, and here is how I feel _____." {emotionally identifying is going to be challenging at first, its not just you!}
After acknowledging the reactive emotions and taking the time to truly identify the connotations to what life has brought your way, we then start moving towards the problem at hand.
This might be a problem without a solution, or a solution that takes extensive amounts of time the sheer anxiety of the process is much more comprehensive than the issue at hand.
The answer is not trying to solve every challenge thrown your way, but instead accepting that what you feel is always ok.
The process of receiving your emotions in a positive light will make your journey to success much more pleasant.
Does this always work for me?
NO... but it may prove helpful if anxiety is holding you back!
When I was in school I felt like every day was changing the rest of my life. If I didn't do one step precisely right, I would be pushing back my career. That amount of pressure day in and day out numbed my ambition quickly. The truth is, I was anxious and scared that I was making the wrong decision. It was not always that serious, but I hadn't taken the time to settle in my emotions.
As we come to the end of 2 years with this beautiful platform to spread positivity and fitness, I set out to create a way to help at least 1 person. I would always say if even one person gains something from this all the time, money, and energy would be worth it. My intentions today have not changed. I want to help at least 1 person, and if I end up impacting many more, it is all just a bonus. No matter where you started or how you got here, please know you are beautiful, and you are loved.
-MM
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